Running for Home by ooza, O - S

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Running for Home by ooza
Chapter 1: "Foreign Road"
*.*.*
I'm standing at the edge again
Bubble gum ball gettin' ready to fall
and I don't know when
I don't know when
This road isn't foreign to my feet
Why is it always the bad things
I seem destined to repeat?
But I know
I will not
ever
admit
defeat
Christia Mantzke – "Bubble Gum Ball"
*.*.*
Bella
I dig through my purse trying desperately to find my cell phone. My hands are
shaking so badly that I manage to fumble the stupid thing. It shoots out of my
hands, hits the ground hard, and skids across the pavement. The battery and
battery cover fly in different directions and I scramble to pick them up before
someone can run over them with their car.
"Shoot," I mumble as I reassemble the stupid thing and wait for it to turn back
on. I quickly dial my mother, Renee. Expecting my call, she picks up on the first
ring.
"Hey baby! How did the last of your finals go?"
"Everything went great, Mom. I think I did really well!" I tell her.
"I knew you would do great. I wish Phil and I could be there to celebrate with you
guys tonight," she whines.
"It's fine. Don't worry about it. I won't have the official grades until you get back
from… there anyway." Lately she and my step-father, Phil, have been traveling a
lot because of his Minor League Baseball career. I can't even keep track of where
they are anymore.
"I know, but I still want to be there for you. Say hi to Jake for us, will you? Is he
in town yet?"
"His plane landed about twenty minutes ago. Hopefully I'll beat him to the
house."
We exchange a few more pleasantries before hanging up. I drive home quickly
hoping Jake isn't waiting for me. Our timing is perfect because he pulls into the
driveway behind me in his rental car. It's Friday night and Jake is staying with me
at Renee and Phil's for the weekend. He wants to stay longer but he is still
finishing up his senior year of high school back in Washington and has to fly back
on Sunday morning.
"Jake!" I call to him as I jump out of the car. I run to him and he scoops me up
into his arms.
"Bella, I missed you so much," he says, placing a big wet kiss on my forehead.
"Gross, put me down," I tease as I wiggle out of his grip and slap him playfully on
the shoulder. "How was the flight?"
"It totally sucked." He laughs. "Do you know they don't give free food anymore?
Not even peanuts. I'm starving."
I laugh with him. Jake's appetite is insatiable. "Come on." I motion toward the
house. "I'll make you lunch."
We eat lunch and spend the rest of the afternoon chatting and watching movies.
There isn't too much to catch up on since we talk on the phone all the time. I
haven't seen Jake in person since December when I flew out to Washington to
spend Christmas with my father Charlie.
Jake and I have been dating for almost two years. We were friends growing up
even though we didn't see each often because he lived in Washington and I lived
in Arizona with Renee. I moved to Forks to live with Charlie when I was 17. It
only took a few months of living there before Jake and I were hanging out
together all the time.
I love Jake; I really do. The problem is that I don't share the same passion for
him as he does for me. After becoming close friends, our relationship had a
natural progression; dating and sex were the next logical steps. I would have
been fine if we stayed friends, but he wanted more, and I wanted him to be
happy.
Sometimes I feel like a pushover because I agreed to be in a relationship with
him even though it wasn't what I wanted. Most of the time I just feel selfish
because I did it to ensure I wouldn't lose his friendship.
"I really do miss you, Bells," Jake says solemnly as we sit on the couch.
"I miss you too, Jake."
"I think you should really consider going to U-Dub this fall instead of next year,"
he says cautiously.
"We've been over this a billion times," I sigh. "I want to get my generals done
before I go to an expensive university. Besides, I'm not ready to go back to
cloudy, crappy Washington. I like the sun here and it's nice to be able to spend
time with Renee."
"You don't even see Renee. She's gone with Phil all the time. That was the reason
you moved in with Charlie to begin with, remember?"
"That's beside the point, Jake. I only have one more year until I'm done anyway."
"There are community colleges in Washington, you know. You can finish your
generals there."
"I'm already registered for the fall. Besides, I have no idea what I want to do for
a career. I'm not even sure if I'll end up at U-Dub."
He scoffs at the possibility. I'm pretty sure he feels my decision to move across
the country to attend a community college is ridiculous. The truth is that I didn't
want to stay in Washington for college. Two years of overcast skies and constant
rain was quite enough for me the first time around. I wanted to go to school
somewhere warm and sunny. I chose Florida Community College because I could
live with Renee and Phil for free. Renee was more than happy to have me around
again and with Phil to take care of her… well, let's just say I didn't have to
anymore.
"You know," he pauses, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, "I have an
apartment lined up for after I graduate next month. You could live with me while
you go to school. It won't cost you anything and you won't have to be alone all
the time."
"Jake—" I don't know how to finish.
"How 'bout this," he starts, and I can almost see the light bulb going on over his
head. "I won't bug you about where you go to college this fall if you come stay
with me for the summer."
Now I really don't know what to say. Spending the summer here, mostly by
myself, is something I have been looking forward to since I moved here last
August. I want time to read, sit in the sun, and figure out what I want to do with
my future. I don't want to spend the summer living with Jake.
"Are you sure you miss me? Because it sure doesn't seem like it," he snaps when
I don't reply. "What about Charlie? You'd rather sit here alone all summer than
see him? He misses you too, you know. And Alice? What about Alice? Isn't she
coming home for the summer?"
"Alice's family moved after she graduated and Charlie is—"
"What about your other friends?" Jake interrupts. "Do you even talk to any of
them anymore?"
Now he's pissing me off.
"First of all, Jacob, I talk to Alice all the time. At least once a week. Second, as
far as my other friends go, I never got close to any of them in the year and a half
I went to school in Forks because I was too busy spending all my time with you!
Third, I am not alone here, Jake. I have friends from college that I talk to all the
time.
"Yes, I miss you, but I've spent my entire life making sure other people were
taken care of, and for once I just want to spend some time by myself!" By the
time I finish my rant I am yelling. I am also shocked at what came out of my
mouth because I've never consciously given any of it much thought.
"How are we supposed to keep our relationship strong if we never see each
other?" he asks angrily. "If you don't come home we're going to fall apart."
I'm not sure how to answer him. We already are falling apart.
"Do you love me, Bella?" he asks.
"Of course I do," I assure him.
"Prove it," he says, his voice filled with determination.
"What?"
"If you love me, then prove it. I'm not going to lose you, Bella. If you won't come
live with me then let's get married. Tomorrow," he demands.
The blood drains from my face and I feel sick to my stomach. Marriage? Jakeand
I have never even discussed marriage before. I stare at him in shock for a few
seconds, but it feels like days. I also might need a doctor because I'm pretty sure
I hyperextended my jaw when it hit the floor.
"What?"
"Please, will you marry me?" he asks kinder this time.
"I can't marry you, Jacob," I whisper in disbelief. "I don't even know if marriage
is something I even want to do. Ever. We've never even talked about it before
and you propose to me like this?"
"Please, Bella. I need you."
It's funny, the power three little words can hold. I. Need. You. Those words set
my resolve. I'm tired of people needing me. I don't want to be responsible for
anyone other than myself. I close my eyes and take a couple of deep breaths. I
feel him slide closer to me on the couch. He wraps his arms around me and his
lips meet mine.
"Jake, stop. I'm sorry but I can't handle this right now."
My heart is pounding like crazy, and the steady beat of the pulse in my head
drowns out all the sounds in the room. I push his arms away from me and stand
up. Without me telling them to, my legs start walking to the door. I can barely
make out Jake calling for me to wait as my feet hit the driveway and I break out
into a run.
The sun has set, and I easily blend into the shadows of the neighborhood. I can
hear him following me, but I'm not ready to be found. How did this day turn into
such a disaster? I felt great about my finals. I was happy to see Jake even if I've
been having doubts about our relationship lately. How did everything turn out so
wrong?
I run a few more blocks until I am sure I lost him. I search my purse for my
phone so I can call one of my friends to pick me up, but after a quick content
check, I recall my phone is on the kitchen counter. Crap. I remember there is a
gas station a few miles down the road and start heading in that direction. I
wonder how much pay phones are now. I wonder if pay phones even exist
anymore.
As I walk, I keep my eyes peeled for Jake. I feel like an idiot for being an
irresponsible coward and running out of the house like that. At the same time, I
enjoy the adrenaline rush it gives me and I'm overcome with the sudden urge to
do something irresponsible.
I finally make it to the gas station and sigh in relief when I spot the block of pay
phones out front. I dig out some change and look for the current rate when I
realize I don't actually have anyone's phone number memorized. Crap. I slam the
phone back on the hook and lean against the side of the building as I try to come
up with Plan B.
A shiny black car in the parking lot catches my attention. It catches my attention
because, apparently, the driver of said car is a jackass who doesn't know how to
park as it's sitting diagonally across two spots. Upon closer inspection, I see it's a
Volvo; a four door sedan no less.
"Yuppie," I mumble under my breath as I turn and enter the gas station. That
walk was longer than I expected and I'm parched. I purchase two bottles of water
and a giant bag of M&M's. Nothing cures a bad day like an abundance of
chocolate covered peanuts coated in a candy shell.
The Yuppiemobile is still in the lot when I leave the store. I give it the stink eye
as I walk past, pouring all my emotion into the gesture as if the car itself was
responsible for my crappy evening. I pause as something else about the car
catches my eye.
It has Illinois license plates.
I stand there lost in thought while staring at the plates until a voice pulls me out
of my reverie.
"Can I help you with something?" His voice is deep and smooth and sexy as all
get out. I turn to look at the man the voice belongs to and am shocked to see
that the voice suits him perfectly.
He is at least six feet tall. His dark brown hair is a sexy mess on the top of his
head, and he has a beard that looks about a week old. My eyes follow the natural
line down the center of his body. The t-shirt he is wearing is tight enough to
reveal the outline of his pecs. His frame is thin, but from his bare arms, I can tell
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Running for Home by ooza, O - S

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